thus making me awesome and them whores
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
