I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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