Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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