So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
