dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
