What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
she smelled like a LAN party
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize