it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
