My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
