Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
we're so committed to being not committed
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
