So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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