It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
