brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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