there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
