careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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