dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
