i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
