Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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