how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
