so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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