How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
