i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
