Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
