Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Someone signed my nipple.
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