When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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