Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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