Farmville is her only friend.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
