Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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