well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
