I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
