East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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