so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
