How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
