More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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