you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
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