Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
