Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
