we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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