I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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