Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
