was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
