I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
