8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
