im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
