i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
