i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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