I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
