I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize