I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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