my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
it's like heaven, but drunker
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I was not drunk enough for that final.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
