HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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