Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I think I am morally bankrupt
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
