playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
