You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
